Sunday, June 27, 2010

The Student Nurse - Saturday Centus Week 8, Sunday, June 28, 2010

The Student Nurse - Saturday Centus Week 8, Sunday, June 28, 2010

Elizabeth walked into her obstetrics class feeling the weight of the world on her
shoulders. The patient she had been following had died en route to the hospital
and so had her six-month-old fetus, another victim of gang violence in San Francisco.

Elizabeth had been called by her patient’s mother who knew to notify her should
Maria go into labor. The poor lady was hysterical, sobbing on the phone. She had
already lost her only son in a drive by shooting, now her only daughter was dead.

Walking to the dorm, I said to Cynthia, "Did you notice Elizabeth in class this morning and how forlorn she seemed?" Perhaps I will write her a comforting note, I thought.

Carmen Henesy 

Copyright (c) 2010 by Carmen Henesy
 All rights reserved.

I am participating in Jenny Matlock's Saturday Centus - Each Saturday you are given a new "prompt" for the week.  Your essay must be 100 words or less, not including the "prompt" words.  The prompt words can be used in any place within your story but must be left intact.  Join in the fun!


  1. Fresh, very intense, well written!!!

  2. What a sad story, and unfortunately one that happens all too often. I like that we find out why Elizabeth looks forlorn, nice use of the prompt. Kathy

  3. Interesting addition, the nursing class...shows the involvement of the nurse with her patients and their stories.

  4. This was very heartbreaking and unfortunately, probably all too true. Great realistic Saturday Centus. Good job.

  5. A bit autobiographical, perhaps? Sad, but so tightly written. Nice Centus.

  6. Sad, and a harsh reality for many.

  7. Sometimes the ones of us who are untouched by violence, need a reminder of how others suffer from it. Thank you for posting this reality check. Good writing.

  8. So sad, so true to so many parents. A wonderfully touching post, thank you.

  9. a sad and nice post.. Congratulations on the publication of your poetry book :)) only a few can do it and you are the one among them.. keep it up and all the best =)

  10. Moving post, great use of a few words.

    PS: I have your book on my coffee table. It is lovely!

  11. Very heart wrenching post...nicely done...Peace and blessings

  12. My name is P.J. -
    Thanks for the comment. This was my first time to do the Saturday Centus. It was fun.

    mbkatc230 -
    Drive by shootings seem to occur on an almost daily basis between San Francisco and Oakland. It is becoming a nightmare.

    Bookie -
    When I was a nursing student ( over 45 years ago in New Orleans ), during our obstetrics rotation, we were assigned a prenatal patient to follow throughout their pregnancy, their delivery and after for two weeks, with one home visit before and after. We really bonded with them. Charity was exactly that - a hospital that provided care for primarily the indigent poor. Some years later, after a student nurse was killed in the projects on a home visit, the governor discontinued visits by students into the community.

    Viki -
    I'm sure, especially in major cities, this tale of drive by shootings is pretty common.

    Tina -
    Yes, it is autobiographic in some ways but I never had a pregnant patient who died from a gun shot wound in this manner.

    secret agent woman -
    The saddest thing about it all, I think, is that, sometimes, it is an innocent bystander who gets killed in these drive bys.

    cjschlottman -
    21 years of working at San Francisco's Level One
    trauma center made me so aware of all the stabbings and gun violence - it just broke my heart to see younger and younger kids involved in it.

    Joanna Jenkins -
    Glad you liked me little tale!!

    mrs.c -
    I read about things like this almost daily in the news. It's overwhelming. People killing for sport or so it seems.

    Priyanka Bhowmick -
    Thank you for the kind words about my book. You could do it yourself...self publish with Createspace, an Amazon company...check it out at their website: It's really
    quite easy and best of all, not expensive at all.

    Glynis -
    I am so honored that you bought my book. I love yours as well. I have to remember to take it with me next time I meet my good friend, Joanne
    Olivieri of Poetic Shutterbug. She's really on a roll now, with two poetry chapbooks, two other books and a cookbook out!

    jeff campbell -
    This was a sad tale, fiction but easily reality.

  13. Carmen, such a sad tale...and probably true way more often then we ever want to imagine.

    I'm glad you linked this little story.

    It was a great and different use of the prompt.