Happy 45th Birthday to My Firstborn, Shawn Edward Smith - December 17, 2015

Very early in the morning of December 17th, 45 years ago, I awoke to find my Concord, Massachusetts world snowy white and the early twinges of labor beginning.

As I headed for the shower, my husband, Ed, was encouraging me to hurry - as the 30 mile drive from our home to Chelsea Naval Hospital was about an hour, even in optimal weather conditions.  Finally, we were on our way and, for some bizarre reason, we brought our collie, Snoopy, with us!

Near the hospital, our car stalled and refused to budge...thankfully, in front of a gas station.  The owner, hearing our tale of woe, loaded us ( minus Snoopy who remained in our car which had been pushed into the gas station lot ) and, with his snow plow at work, drove as fast as he could to the Chelsea ER.  From my arrival onward, everything slowed down.  I was given an epidural - which Shawn seemed to enjoy - because he took his sweet time, arriving late in the evening.  

Shawn, a week old, slept through most of his first Christmas.  He amazed us by sleeping about six hours a night when he was only two months old - so I went back to work night shift as a psych nurse at McLean Hospital in Belmont, Mass.

When he was a toddler, we moved to Tampa, Florida and, after two years there, we headed to Ed's next Air Force assignment in southern California.  Shawn got his wanderlust early in life!

After two years in Fullerton, I moved to San Francisco. Shawn flew down frequently to visit his father, having no qualms at all when I would lament about his flying alone.  At six, he looked at me and commented, "What do you mean, Mom?  The plane is full of people!"

Thankfully, Shawn's dad met Lois who became Shawn's

 "other mother." They celebrated their 25th anniversary several years ago.  I couldn't have asked for a better 

person to be in my son's life.  I remind Ed that I did him a great favor by moving to San Francisco!!!

Ed and Lois when they came for Shawn's high school graduation

Shawn decided to join the Air Force Reserves after finishing a couple of years of junior college.  He looks so young and skinny in this picture.

With his GI Bill money, he returned and got his BS in Electrical Engineering from San Jose State University.  He has continued in the Air Force Reserves, achieving, to date, the rank of Master Sergeant, having been deployed on several occasions, and filling in for months at a time at his home base, Travis, in northern California.  

I am immensely proud of my son ( as I am of my other two sons as well ) but I am most proud of Shawn's being there for his two younger brothers.  They had an absent father from the time they were three and five-years-old and Shawn stepped up to the bar, helping in every way.  At one point, I went through disabling back surgery and he was my lifesaver, shouldering so much responsibility as a junior high school student.  There is no way I can ever repay him or thank him enough.  So much of the men Alex and Jeremy have become is because of their big brother, Shawn.

Shawn is still single but he would make some lady a terrific partner.  He is a fabulous cook, a great dancer, wonderful

with his little niece, Harper, a meticulous housekeeper, astute with money and a great travel planner ( something I like to think I helped inspire ).  

Of course, I admit to a little bias but I like to think he's not a bad looking fellow.  The ladies nowadays say he resembles George Clooney.

With his beautiful sister-in-law, Laura Vukasinovic

Shawn on the left, Alex in the middle, Jeremy on the right - in the birthing room 

shortly before Harper's debut

It doesn't seem possible that nearly a half century has passed since Shawn's arrival in this world.  Thank you, son, for adding so much to my life and for being the fine man you are.  I love you and am so proud to be your mother.

There is an awful lot of white at the temples and in your beard!!!

A Great 68th Birthday in Jaipur, Rajasthan, India - October 3, 2012

I just spent two hours at the computer and had this post all but completed.  Somehow, 
it disappeared.  I cannot believe it.  All that work for nothing.  I just hate being at
the mercy of the gods of the internet!  Oh, well, here we go again though I'm a bit
tired of looking at my wrinkled birthday face!

I got up at my usual 6AM on the 3rd of October, all my joints and muscles aching to
remind me that I am no sweet, young thing.  I've been having massage alternate 
days almost since arriving in Jaipur and, for about six weeks, I've also been having
accupressure.  I really do think that has helped tremendously.  At 7AM, my lovely
landlady, Madhulika arrived with a beautiful bouquet of red roses and I had my
morning chai.  

After breakfast and my massage, I headed to Dr. Galundia's office.
He welcomed the "birthday girl" and greeted me with a kiss on the cheek and, 
at my reminder that "this is India," I got a second kiss.  Come to think of it, NONE 
of my U. S. doctors has ever kissed me.  After the kiss, he left his office and, though 
he's told me I need to lose more weight, he came back, bearing a candy bar - "only 
because it's your birthday."

From Dr. Galundia's office, my driver took me to the Holiday Inn for lunch with my
friend, Food and Beverage Manager, Surendra Dhabai, formerly of Royal 
Caribbean Cruise Line.  The hotel has a lovely buffet with a large selection of 
both continental and Indian food and a nice dessert spread.  I was able to limit
myself to only five jalabees, a sweet Indian concoction that has become a favorite
of mine.  It's almost like flat swirls of a batter, fried in ghee, then soaked in a 
sugar syrup.

Many Indian hotels have handsome doormen like this, sporting turbans and these

large moustaches!

Lobby of the Holiday Inn, Jaipur

Definitely NOT a place for the weight watcher

The Holiday Inn dining room

Lovely salads

A delicious meal, every bite

My friend, Surendra Dhabai

Chef Roushan

I love it!  I got a rare positive comment from my youngest son, Jeremy ( soon 

to be 28 ):  "Damn, looking all skinny.  Keep up the good work."

Surendra and me - he needs roller skates to keep up with all his work!

Here are all those handsome Indian fellows - they remind me of the Royal 

Caribbean wait staff - I lovingly called them my "Bollywood boys."

About 4P, as I was leaving the Holiday Inn, Ajay Singh Shekhawat, manager

of the beautiful heritage hotel, the Umaid Mahal where I stayed three days in

January and two days this past June, called and told me to be on the Umaid

Mahal rooftop at 5PM.  "Good grief," I thought, "I can barely waddle to the 

taxi."  I could hardly disobey my Jaipur hero and I even arrived early.  

Precisely at 5PM, he escorted me to the rooftop restaurant where a lovely

bouquet awaited me, along with a chocolate cake, and Spanish, "Sangre de

Toro" wine.  Of course, there were also Bollywood boys present.

Ajay is amazing.  He has always remembered that yellow roses are my favorites.

Cake number 2 - I shared it...but the wine was all mine.

Chicken pakoras with my favorite spicy green mint sauce.

 y

My Umaid Mahal Bollywood boys

With Ajay Singh Shekhawat

Now, one would think that would be enough birthday celebration for a vintage

American in India but, oh, no, more was yet to come.  My landlady had arranged

dinner at our residence.  We had a pre-dinner birthday cake out in the garden

with her daughter, Geetanjali and son-in-law, Karan Rathore, and her two 

grandsons, Vishu and Arjun, and my friend, Ajay Shekhawat.  

Cake number three, a glorious fruit and whipped cream concoction

Vishu helped me blow out candles.

Nani Madhulika and Arjun 

Ajay, in non Umaid Mahal clothes, for a change!

My beautiful Indian purse from the Rathores

A wonderful birthday dinner

Beautiful Geetanjali Rathore and Vishu

Madhulika and her grandsons, Arjun and Vishu

Bindi ( okra ) - a favorite of mine

Wonderful spicy red beans...as good as New Orleans, but minus ham or andouille

A delicious meat ( not beef, of course ) dish

Well, that was my 68th birthday - the first one I've celebrated in India.  I felt so

pampered and indulged, with birthday phone calls from "family" all over India

and so much special treatment by my Jaipur "relatives."  I can't even begin to

thank everyone enough.

Happy 29th Birthday to Alexander the Great ( the one I delivered) - August 27, 2011

Since I've posted so many pictures already of my children, I won't go overboard

and do so today on Alex's 29th birthday.  I can't believe all those years have

gone by since I agonized in the delivery room, trying to expel that 8 pound, 9

ounce football player from my uterus.  It all happened fairly quickly, thank

heavens, since I didn't even get an epidural!  Part of that was my fault.  I had

Alex at Mt. Zion Hospital in San Francisco where I'd worked both in psychiatry

and the operating room.  My inpatient adolescent psych unit had ceased to

exist and was, in fact, part of the building that had became the Department

of Obstetrics and Gynecology. 

I had arrived, in labor, a bit early so I went across the street to visit my pals

in the operating room.  My obstetrician gave me CLEAR instructions to

come back when my contractions were five minutes apart.  I had fully

intended to do so but I waited for one more friend to get her afternoon

break and, the next thing I knew, my contractions were four minutes apart.

By the time, I waited for the elevator, crossed the street to the Pavilion and

waited for that elevator, I realized I was REALLY uncomfortable.  The

nurse checked me and rushed me to the delivery room. 

"Wait, wait," I complained loudly, "I can't have a baby without an

epidural!  I didn't go to classes.  I want an epidural." 

Totally unsympathetic, my doc said, "Don't worry, your son will be here

before you know it." 

I tell you, I never pushed so hard in my life and I guess I pushed him around

so much for eighteen years that he left home for UC Davis after high school

and he's been gone ever since!

Alex is the middle of my three sons!  I'd forgotten about birthing babies since

Shawn was already eleven when Alex came along!  He's a terrific young man

and he chose a wonderful wife.  So far, he's the only one of my boys to get

married.  I owe him big time for bringing Laura into our family ( oh, yes, he

also gave us Taffy, my female granddog! ).



For some reason, as a toddler, Pampers boxes were Alex's favorite toys.  He had

no use for all the expensive toys piled up in his room - that is, other than his

collection of  stuffed leopards and his supreme favorite, "dirty leppie".

Alex and Laura just got back from Hawaii so I'm posting a couple of

pictures from their vacation.

He's certainly gotten skinny since his college football days!

Laura and Alex at the Pali in Honolulu - the two share

August as a birthday month!  Laura's was the 12th

while they were in Hawaii!

Today, while going through yet another stack of papers for the garbage pile, I

came across a booklet Alex did for his English class ( it won't be tossed! ) 15

years ago.  He titled it, "Creative Free-Style Poetry".  His teacher gave him an

A+.  Reading it today, I shed a few tears.  Included among his compositions

were works about me and his brother, Jeremy.  Wonder why his oldest

brother, Shawn, wasn't in there!!



It really want't my intent to have THREE sons.  Each time, I kept thinking

I'd finally have my little girl, to dress in frilly pink frocks, to set her hair in

ringlets, to take on shopping expeditions, to share my love of cooking

and cake decorating.  Thinking about it now, though, I wouldn't give up

any of my wonderful three sons.  Each of them is so special to me, each

unique and individual and I love them dearly.

Alex, on your birthday, I want you to know I truly am proud of the man

you've become, of how hard you work, of your integrity and kindness and

respect for others.  You know what you want and work toward that goal,

regardless of how others might try to dissuade you.  You have a lovely

wife and home and two great dogs who adore you.  I know it is not easy

working your crazy schedule and going to school but you keep your nose

to the grindstone and, eventually, it will all be behind you.  My only

admonition is to, occasionally, take time to stop and smell the flowers.

I love you.  Have a happy birthday.  I am so happy you, Shawn, and

Jeremy were chosen for me.

Mom